Really Tired September 2005
"So I guess it’s that time to talk about cancer. It was 2005, it was summer time, actually it was right near the end of school, so it was about June of 2005 – I felt like there was something going on with my right breast that was not quite right. I was also kind of tired which was not unexpected – a mom with four kids and you’re 45 years old and you’re running around doing things and it’s expected, you’re going to be tired. But I was a little more tired than normal, didn’t have a lot of energy and there was something wrong with my right breast. I have finally gone in to see the doctor.
"During the summer I saw a nurse practitioner, she said it looked like I had mastitis which is kind of weird because Kylie is four at this point and had not been nursing and how in the world did I get mastitis? So she put me on an antibiotic and so we were kind of waiting for it to run its course. I was a busy mom, I was teaching piano students, I had four children – one in high school, one in middle school, and I would have two in elementary school that fall – Eric would be in fifth grade that year. We were swimming and busy with that and things didn’t clear up.
"I got the phone call from the doctor down at Kaiser asking if that mastitis had ever cleared up and I said no, and he said ok I need you in here today and I need to check you out. So I came in and he checked it and said, ok I’m going to put you on antibiotics again and I want an appointment in two weeks to check you out and see how you are doing. I was like, ok fine, so he put me on antibiotics again – in between the first trip to the doctor and the second trip to the doctor that’s when we went to Martin’s Cove to do the handcart experience with my brother’s wife and we had also gone to South Dakota to see Mount Rushmore, to be there on that vacation – reading Harry Potter book. I knew there was something wrong with my breast and I was getting very concerned and the thought of cancer has actually crossed my mind.
"The thing that was different about this was they are always talking about a lump. There wasn’t a lump it was like my breast was swollen and sore. I remember when I had gotten back to my parents house I finally had cell phone coverage – I had a – it was very new for me to have a cell phone – it didn’t have good coverage across Nevada – there wasn’t a lot of coverage there – so anyways I had gotten to my parents house – I remember standing out on the driveway, I didn’t want to worry anybody, but calling the advise nurse and asking about this, she said do you feel a lump and I said no and oh its not cancer not to worry you probably just have an infection its going to be fine.
"So we got back and this is when the doctor had called me and said did that clear up no it didn’t called me in there and said ok we you need to get in here and it didn’t clear up and so I went down to see him, he said ok – and this was the end of August he said we need – it was the last day of August actually August 31st– he said Ok this is not cleared up I need you to go down to Walnut Creek today to the Breast Care clinic – the Breast Clinic. And I’m like I’ve got piano to teach and I don’t really have time for this but he was you’re going today. I said, “But I’ve got the…” “You’re going today.” “Fine.” So I went home and taught one lesson I think I taught Kayla’s lesson and had to cancel Abby’s lesson cause I had to go back down to the appointment with the Breast Care Clinic and make sure the kids were all taken care of and situated.
"Then I went on down there and they looked at it and said, “Umm we need to biopsy this today.” When you hear the word biopsy and I’m freaking out. They said you’ll need you to go sit in the room; we have to set up the room, we have a few other patients to see but we’ll get this done. So they sent me up to the waiting room. I literally felt like I was looking at a magazine but the magazine was upside down because I was wasn’t looking at the magazine I was starting to imagine all these horrible things that I had cancer, that I had four small children, I was going to die and going to leave my husband with my children, that it was going to ruin their life…. So they called me in and they did a biopsy. They said we’ll get the results to you as soon as we can, it may be a few days. I’m thinking a few days?!! Then I went home.
"The plan had been that I was going to be driving down to Fresno that afternoon with the three older children - no – the three younger children to go see Uncle Rodger the dentist (before we had dental coverage). Ralph got home and I was extremely upset and I was trying not to communicate that fear and apprehension to the kids but … he decided that he would take the younger three kids and drive them down to Fresno take them to the dentist the next morning and then drive home and Amy would stay with me. Amy knew something was up that we were just waiting for some results from the doctor but… by this time she was between her freshman and sophomore years in high school. She was fifteen and so we went clothes shopping for school that day and just had a great mother daughter time with it.
"It was about 4 o’clock that afternoon I remember exactly where I was sitting on the couch and we got the phone call from Roxanne Lee to let me know that I had inflammatory breast cancer. And fortunately it wasn’t too much longer until dad walked in. I was a basket case I sobbed uncontrollably from about 30 minutes and then I was like Lisa pull yourself together. Fortunately about 45 minutes Ralph got home with the kids. With the kids…. the kids heard breast cancer and they were scared. Ralph heard breast cancer and he was scared. I was terrified I had no idea what was going to be happening with my life, my wonderful beautiful life with my great husband and my four kids and my - you know - my great life. I knew at this point that my life was going to be changing, but I didn’t know how. I didn’t know what to expect or what to think.
"About an hour after we got the phone call from Dr. Lee uhmm, Dr. Lu – the surgeon who had done the biopsy to let us know that yes this was inflammatory breast cancer – I got a call from Kaiser from the breast care coordinators, now even to this day that job description just makes me laugh – who knew that I needed somebody to coordinate my breasts!? Anyways – she talked to me for about 30 minutes, this wonderful kind caring nurse who just kind of talked me through some of the things that were happening in the next few days. She set up an appointment for me to, for Ralph and I to come in to see her the next day. I was diagnosed on a Thursday and the next morning was Friday and so she set up an appointment for us to come in the next morning about 10 o’clock. To talk with her and go over what the treatment was going to be and a tentative time line for the things I could expect, some of the things I would need to learn.
"During the summer I saw a nurse practitioner, she said it looked like I had mastitis which is kind of weird because Kylie is four at this point and had not been nursing and how in the world did I get mastitis? So she put me on an antibiotic and so we were kind of waiting for it to run its course. I was a busy mom, I was teaching piano students, I had four children – one in high school, one in middle school, and I would have two in elementary school that fall – Eric would be in fifth grade that year. We were swimming and busy with that and things didn’t clear up.
"I got the phone call from the doctor down at Kaiser asking if that mastitis had ever cleared up and I said no, and he said ok I need you in here today and I need to check you out. So I came in and he checked it and said, ok I’m going to put you on antibiotics again and I want an appointment in two weeks to check you out and see how you are doing. I was like, ok fine, so he put me on antibiotics again – in between the first trip to the doctor and the second trip to the doctor that’s when we went to Martin’s Cove to do the handcart experience with my brother’s wife and we had also gone to South Dakota to see Mount Rushmore, to be there on that vacation – reading Harry Potter book. I knew there was something wrong with my breast and I was getting very concerned and the thought of cancer has actually crossed my mind.
"The thing that was different about this was they are always talking about a lump. There wasn’t a lump it was like my breast was swollen and sore. I remember when I had gotten back to my parents house I finally had cell phone coverage – I had a – it was very new for me to have a cell phone – it didn’t have good coverage across Nevada – there wasn’t a lot of coverage there – so anyways I had gotten to my parents house – I remember standing out on the driveway, I didn’t want to worry anybody, but calling the advise nurse and asking about this, she said do you feel a lump and I said no and oh its not cancer not to worry you probably just have an infection its going to be fine.
"So we got back and this is when the doctor had called me and said did that clear up no it didn’t called me in there and said ok we you need to get in here and it didn’t clear up and so I went down to see him, he said ok – and this was the end of August he said we need – it was the last day of August actually August 31st– he said Ok this is not cleared up I need you to go down to Walnut Creek today to the Breast Care clinic – the Breast Clinic. And I’m like I’ve got piano to teach and I don’t really have time for this but he was you’re going today. I said, “But I’ve got the…” “You’re going today.” “Fine.” So I went home and taught one lesson I think I taught Kayla’s lesson and had to cancel Abby’s lesson cause I had to go back down to the appointment with the Breast Care Clinic and make sure the kids were all taken care of and situated.
"Then I went on down there and they looked at it and said, “Umm we need to biopsy this today.” When you hear the word biopsy and I’m freaking out. They said you’ll need you to go sit in the room; we have to set up the room, we have a few other patients to see but we’ll get this done. So they sent me up to the waiting room. I literally felt like I was looking at a magazine but the magazine was upside down because I was wasn’t looking at the magazine I was starting to imagine all these horrible things that I had cancer, that I had four small children, I was going to die and going to leave my husband with my children, that it was going to ruin their life…. So they called me in and they did a biopsy. They said we’ll get the results to you as soon as we can, it may be a few days. I’m thinking a few days?!! Then I went home.
"The plan had been that I was going to be driving down to Fresno that afternoon with the three older children - no – the three younger children to go see Uncle Rodger the dentist (before we had dental coverage). Ralph got home and I was extremely upset and I was trying not to communicate that fear and apprehension to the kids but … he decided that he would take the younger three kids and drive them down to Fresno take them to the dentist the next morning and then drive home and Amy would stay with me. Amy knew something was up that we were just waiting for some results from the doctor but… by this time she was between her freshman and sophomore years in high school. She was fifteen and so we went clothes shopping for school that day and just had a great mother daughter time with it.
"It was about 4 o’clock that afternoon I remember exactly where I was sitting on the couch and we got the phone call from Roxanne Lee to let me know that I had inflammatory breast cancer. And fortunately it wasn’t too much longer until dad walked in. I was a basket case I sobbed uncontrollably from about 30 minutes and then I was like Lisa pull yourself together. Fortunately about 45 minutes Ralph got home with the kids. With the kids…. the kids heard breast cancer and they were scared. Ralph heard breast cancer and he was scared. I was terrified I had no idea what was going to be happening with my life, my wonderful beautiful life with my great husband and my four kids and my - you know - my great life. I knew at this point that my life was going to be changing, but I didn’t know how. I didn’t know what to expect or what to think.
"About an hour after we got the phone call from Dr. Lee uhmm, Dr. Lu – the surgeon who had done the biopsy to let us know that yes this was inflammatory breast cancer – I got a call from Kaiser from the breast care coordinators, now even to this day that job description just makes me laugh – who knew that I needed somebody to coordinate my breasts!? Anyways – she talked to me for about 30 minutes, this wonderful kind caring nurse who just kind of talked me through some of the things that were happening in the next few days. She set up an appointment for me to, for Ralph and I to come in to see her the next day. I was diagnosed on a Thursday and the next morning was Friday and so she set up an appointment for us to come in the next morning about 10 o’clock. To talk with her and go over what the treatment was going to be and a tentative time line for the things I could expect, some of the things I would need to learn.
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